FORGIVENESS
Anyone who has ever embarked on a self- improvement plan knows that eventually the topic of forgiveness will present itself regardless of whether the original focus was physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual. But how does one forgive while still hurting from some real or imagined negative experience and why is forgiveness important? Life is filled with emotional experiences; some painful and some not, but it must be understood that emotions are energy (Energy in motion). Every individual brings into each lifetime, the accumulated energy from their previous lifetimes, and although much of this is positive, it also includes anything unresolved with individuals or groups. Until an individual is spiritually ready to release this accumulated energy, it is unknowingly carried from lifetime to lifetime in the individual’s energy field creating energy blockages which eventually manifest as physical disease or depression.
Being blissfully unaware of these pockets of old energy, people simply live their lives. When an individual is spiritually and emotionally ready, he often becomes aware of the fact that emotions seem to be coloring his thought process. This realization offers clues as to those areas within self that need deeper examination. Forgiveness is the key that opens the door to the release of emotional energy pockets. All experiences needing forgiveness (past or present), offer opportunities for all those involved to honestly examine their belief systems, and then if serious about forgiveness, get to work.
Most believe that forgiveness simply means forgetting; that is, getting to a place of believing that “It doesn’t matter” or “The issue really isn’t important so I should just let it go”. Attempting to simply forget a painful experience always involves the burying of negative emotions, often done very successfully. This suppression or repression of emotional energy is what creates energy blocks in our etheric and emotional fields which in turn proceed to manifest as physical disease. Burying emotions is simply a form of denial, whereas true forgiveness is a release. Suppressing emotions in the belief that this brings closure sooner or later will result in the sudden and inappropriate bursting forth of this energy when triggered by some experience. This always leaves the person confused, depressed, and unable to understand his own inappropriate reaction. Until consciously released, pockets of negative emotional energy simply pop up when least expected. Even individuals not inclined to approach forgiveness from the deeper spiritual sense must understand that holding negative energy (anger, hurt, frustration, revenge etc.) hurts the holder, and not the person who committed the offence. Everyone must ask themselves; “What am I feeding my Soul?”
Many simply give up any effort to forgive, believing it to be beyond their personal ability or that those involved do not deserve forgiveness. Forgiveness is not a forced attempt to forget something deeply hurtful, nor does it mean that we must strive to attain an emotional or human sense of love for the individual or individuals involved. However, it does require a willingness to see with new eyes—that is, from spiritual truth which sees beyond the concepts of duality and separation (bad vs. good, victim vs. aggressor).
How do we begin our move into real forgiveness? First, once and for all, there must be a willingness to let go of the belief that forgiveness means forgetting; forgetting is an impossible task based in an ignorance of what forgiveness really is. Attempting to simply forget a painful issue not only suppresses the emotions involved, but also feeds the belief that there is an “it” needing forgiveness--that is, a “good” person (you) versus a “bad” person (them). This is duality and separation (the energy of the third dimension with all its concepts and beliefs). It is an attempt to solve a problem on the level of the problem and for those seeking spiritual solutions; this vital work must be done from a more evolved level.
There has to be an honest admission and acceptance of what happened--it was traumatic and hurt deeply. Write down every feeling, belief, and emotion about the experience in as honest and soul searching a manner as possible, even to admitting to feeling hate for the person or persons involved. There can be no “putting a good face on it” in the belief that you are being more compassionate and thus more spiritual—“A good Christian”. Allow yourself to acknowledge every emotion still active within you-- anger, distrust, guilt, pain, rage, hurt, disappointment, betrayal, resentment, etc. etc. To deny any negative emotion simply hinders release and healing. At this point you may even find yourself being prompted to remember forgotten or suppressed emotions because an exercise like this gives your Spiritual Guides permission to step in and help more because this work indicates to them that you are choosing to learn, forgive, and move spiritually deeper.
After writing and acknowledging the negative emotions you are feeling, next examine the experience itself asking yourself what exactly happened. See the experience from every angle; honestly, clearly and without bias or emotion. You will find that you are guided in this exercise also, as you begin to remember forgotten painful details which in turn lead to new facets of understanding.
Then ask yourself and write down the answers;
1. What did I learn from this experience?
2. What are the other person’s beliefs about this event and how did their beliefs play a part?
3. What part did my personal concepts and beliefs play in this?
4. Do I believe that only my views and opinions are correct?
5. How could this have been handled differently?
6. How would I act differently today?
Serious inner work such as this, allows no room for making excuses or playing the “blame game”. Forgiveness work is not for the faint-hearted because only a brave and serious individual is able to honestly look within, examine his belief system, acknowledge any false concepts he may find there, and then consciously clear them. This is especially difficult when surrounded by family and friends who are holding old concepts of judgment and criticism and who encourage you the “victim” to do the same. An inability to forgive always involves personal ego; that sense of self that believes it has been wronged and wants to see the other person or group punished. It is the belief that if I forgive, I will be saying that what was done to me was nothing and is not important.
It is very difficult to forgive as long as we believe we have been wronged. That is why in order for forgiveness to really take place, it must be done from a higher level. Complete forgiveness and release is only possible when an individual comprehends a oneness of all life and the reasons all individuals are on earth in the first place.
It is impossible to get any new or fresh perspectives as long as the issue is seen from the level of engagement that created it in the first place. In order to be permanent, forgiveness must flow from a deeper, more evolved state of consciousness; that is, a different state of consciousness than the one which caused hurt and anger in the first place. The attainment of a consciousness of Oneness enables an individual to take back their power, let go forever of “victimhood”, and release accumulated negative energy. Making the decision to pursue forgiveness from a higher spiritual level brings about an inner shift which then enables the forgiver to clearly examine the facts, including their personal beliefs and part in what took place.
Each and every individual has chosen to be on earth to learn and spiritually evolve within the denseness of third dimensional energy; working to fulfill their pre-birth life plan and spiritually evolve to new levels. Experiences requiring forgiveness are now recognized as planned interactions set up by all persons involved before incarnation for the purpose of spiritual growth. These pre-birth plans are forgotten in the heavy energy of third dimensional living, but the Higher Self remembers and acts to bring about the perfect circumstances necessary for our chosen lesson or lessons. It is only from this deeper level of spiritual understanding that an individual is able to see the painful events of their lives for what they are; experiences chosen pre-birth by them and no one else, specifically to bring their awareness to new levels of understanding. Pre-birth planning sessions always involve the other person or persons involved in the incident--those we are now trying to forgive. Lessons are chosen to specifically address whatever issues we are spiritually ready to release and move beyond.
Frequently the individual who causes us the most grief, the one we are now trying to forgive, is someone that out of great love for us, volunteered to play this role in order for us to learn. These ideas are difficult to accept because we have been taught to blame and dislike anyone who causes us pain, but when experiences are seen from this higher truth, everything begins to make sense and the sting of the experience begins to lessen.
There is a sense of gratitude that comes when an individual realizes that his painful life experiences were actually learning experiences specifically and personally chosen. Experiences involving large groups are either karmic in nature or done by volunteers in order to help the world awaken to new levels of understanding. Once truth becomes an attained state of consciousness, the desire for revenge and retribution dissolves. Forgiveness and release automatically follows and with it a sense of relief and profound gratitude in the knowledge that this particular lesson is finished and will never need to be experienced again.
9/16/11
Recommended reading; “Radical Forgiveness” by Colon Tipping
